If I had been there ......

Sometimes feeling bad... not able to get into a foriegn country... and earn in dollars...visit places... share photographs.... but many times feeling good of being able to live in Chennai..be with parents... be with my doggy... be with the childrens at SMILE...

Many a times.. people ask me .. why didnt you try for a onsite oppurtunity......come on you must be earning in pounds and dollars.... even after hearing all that... i too feel... why didnt i try to work some where outside the home town and earn in dollars......but later then... i feel i did take up the right decision of stayin here... after all success is what we measure as a result of our decisions....

We grow... grow up as adults... and start earn in thousands... lakhs... which is all good... buy a car... buy a home.... get married....if you look at each and every moment that you could rejoice in your life... you will also find your parents... rejoicing twice about thier childrens prosperity.... there are no expectations from them....

they too worked hard... they earned for us in hundreds..thousands...took loans... for our education.... tried to save a little.... sacrificed most of their pleasures... and lived for us... and still living for us... now people who worked with me (22 out of 25) ... have happily flyed out to U.S (which is the only place in earth considered for living at least according to them
alright.. no offence meant... not all of them :)) .... happily go out to all possible tourist destinations....take photos.. and share that... not even knowing that we sitting here might be least intrested to see some unknown place in the earth with just 2 or 3 well known idiots posing in differnt directions... they come back .... they get married... they go back...
probably ask parents to come in a dependent VISA (Mind You! - You have been dependent on them for all your ages ... before you were actually earning and still dependent on them to grow up your kids..... a baby sitter in US actually cost more and you are not willing to pay for that.....)
They may not be able to withstand the cold or extreme weather.. they may be missing out thier own set of people with whom they have thier evening chats.... they may be missing thier daily visit to the nearby temple... but inspite of all that... they wanted to travel miles... just because... they want to be their children and grandchildren.. just for the comfort of being with thier own souls.... I have seen so many such souls in airport who wanted to live with thier children...they pack everything and also try to get accustomed to this new way of life... and come and stay with you for some time.....but all their heart will be longing to come back to India....

Once in a while.... may be your christmas vacation.... people come out to visit the home town... and the main intention may not be to see those dear ones.... but something which sounds different!!!! yes ... to investtt??? their hard earned dollars into some real estate property... and nothing else... get the formalities.. done... and here again... the parents are busy
the whole month before you arraive to finanlise on the place....

Nobody can refuse all these... maybe some are doing it.. and some wanted to do this... and some dont have the oppurtunity to do this... but almost... 60-70% of people are following this trend....

But for how long is the question... how many of us are content with what we earn... how many people who went to US are really thinking back to settle down here in India... how many of them are still struggling for a green card and citizenship... forget it.. it is not going to be my problem :-)

I am happy that I am with them... I am happy to see a new soap in the soap box every time i need a new one...all those little things that my mom does for me... I am happy to sip the bed coffee served with love every morning.... nobody need to tell me a good morning... all i need is that cuppa of coffee from my mom..... I am lucky enough to enjoy such little moments in life....I dont share my life with a canon 6 mega pixel camera ... i share it real... with them... do a vetti talk before going to bed... hug them everytime in mornign... make fun... laugh... i am proud that i dont have a third person as a driver.. when i take my parents out for any function...

I feel it is my responsibility to ensure that their dreams are realized and what they failed to see when they were young,it is my responsibility to ensure that they experience all those they should and feel that their life is complete.I will do my best to give the best possible attention to all their wishes. Just because they are old does not mean that they will have to give up everything and keep sacrificing for their grandchildren also. They have wishes, too.

There is no more asking to myself......If I had been there.....


P.S: Inspired by recent movie which I saw (Cinema Paradiso)
Salvatore (hero) stays in a village and he gets a invaluable freindship of Alfredo( a theatre projectionist)... with the advise from Alfredo... Salvatore leaves his home town.. and returns back after 30 years....

Salvatore ask his mom - Do you ever felt that you missed me?
Mom - No i dont... but i feel that only when I bolt the door in the night...
Salvatore - You never used to bolt the door those days..
Mom - I do (smiling)... those day when you come late from the theatre... i used to pretend that I am sleeping.... once you reach home... i silently go to the door and bolt it before i sleep....
but now after you have left from here.... and every night when i bolt the door... i used to feel that i am leaving some one out there.... far away...
Salvatore - silences for a moment.. with tears n eyes..

P.P.S - This post may not be true for all those who live abroad... so dont get offended if you are staying abroad...... because thoughts may vary... opinions differ... these are all just my point of view and after all its my blog :-) take it easy